Santa Fe – Day 4

We took the car back first thing this morning and then had our last breakfast together.  After that E hopped on a shuttle back to Albuquerque and I went to the Birthing From Within introductory workshop.  I was a little nervous because I felt like I didn’t “know enough.”  I’ve never had a kid, never seen a birth, never worked in the “granola” industry.  The workshop was run like a conversation – people asked questions and tangents were formed.  This made things more interesting and I feel like I’m likely to retain more information – that is, once I process it all.

Scared the bejesus out of me at first...

I met this awesome woman from Albuquerque and we had lunch together.  Toward the end of the day we did an activity where we practiced moving and and our of our masculine and feminine energies.  Most of the time we do this spontaneously, and these energies co-exist without a lot of conflict.  We did an exercise and at the end of it we were asked which was easier – standing still, or moving.  I found both equally comfortable, but I think that’s because the movements we were making were so subtle.  As the facilitator explained masculine and feminine energy traits, I found I had difficulty figuring out which energy I “lived in” more often.  I guess it’s like any personality profile where you wonder how much of who you are is because of your natural tendencies versus because of the environment that you grew up in.  Anyway, I was complimented on my ability to call upon my “masculine” energy – my ability to hold space and radiate calmness.  It was very rewarding to hear this – I’m always so anxious and unsure of myself, but apparently I can pull it together when I need to.

::sigh::  I am exhausted.  I’m doing my laundry and fantasizing about dinner.  Or sleep.

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